It is with deep regret and with a tear in my eye that I write about the devastating news that my Mum, (Joshua and Brandon's Nan) finally lost her battle against cancer late last night. The boys loved their Nan dearly and in the closing days it was heart breaking to not let them see her to say good bye at risk of really upsetting them and affecting them emotionally. Mum was a fighter to the very end and part of her strength and determination to fight against the evil disease was to spend as much time as possible for her children and grand children. It now chokes me up to think she will not get to see the boys grow into young men.
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| Nanny and her boys. |
She loved the boys dearly and got so excited every time she could see them or spend some time with them. She was always spoiling them with gifts and money. Every time they did well at school, football, swimming etc she would cross their palms with some money. She was probably the most generous person you will ever know. Despite hardly ever having two pennies to rub together, when ever she did have money she would rarely spend it on herself and instead would be forever buying gifts for other people.
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| Little B and Nanny all dressed up at Bonoween 2012. |
If nothing else I pray to god that the boys learn from this experience to never, ever smoke. I also hope that they learn what it is like to a be a real fighter. I may think I am big and tough at times, but I didn't have an ounce on my Mum. She was a true fighter and gave cancer one hell of a battle. I will be first to put my hand up and so there is no way I could ever go through what she has endured over the last 2.5 years. She is a true warrior and I will certainly think twice next time I complain about the odd man flue or a few aches and pains after a run or workout. If the boys have half the drive and fight that their Nan had then they are going to go a long way in life.
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| Mum/Nan - the ultimate fighter. |
This morning we had the very difficult job of explaining what had happened to their Nan and that they will never see her again. We explained that the cancer which was making her poorly has finally taken her life and that she has now gone up to heaven. The boys commented that at least she was with Grandad and Ben now but then also asked some difficult questions like, "how did she get up to heaven?", at which point the only answer I could think of was to say that the angels had flown her there. Even now Joshua frequently comments that he still misses his Granddad and he was a lot closer to his Nan, so over the coming days I expect some more difficult questions from him and some emotional responses. Every time he speaks about "Nanny dying" you can't help but shed another tear, he keeps on saying that it is so sad that she is dead.
There is so much we will all miss about Mum/Nan, far to much to ever list on a blog. From the simple things in life to a hug or someone to talk too, down to her homemade bread pudding, meatloaf or Boston Bean Stew. Who will now keep me in check for all the stupid things I do like cycling to work in extreme weather conditions with no fear of my own well being etc. She may be gone but she will never, ever be forgotten.
Driving to football yesterday Joshua was flicking through the radio stations on the car and what song did he stumble across, "Spirit in the Sky" by Norman Greenbaum. What were the chances of this being on the radio on the day when she finally leaves us to go and be with Slim again, especially given that this is one of the songs she has requested for her funeral. Well she is now a spirit in the sky and in all of our hearts forever more..............
Mum/Nan 2nd April 1954 to 11th May 2013
Love you always, we four Kings.
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